Three minutes into his scheduled eight-hour shift at Sama's content moderation facility in Nairobi, OpenAI CEO Sam Altman was already texting his pilot about emergency fuel protocols.
"I want our human labelers to understand they're part of something bigger," said Altman, dabbing his forehead with a Patagonia handkerchief. "My $10 million salary might seem high, but after my SF mortgage and daily mushroom coffee subscription, I'm practically living paycheck to paycheck."
The visit was part of OpenAI's new "Responsible AI Leadership Initiative," but quickly went off-script when Altman learned the facility's broken air conditioning couldn't accommodate his suggested meditation pods. "Have you tried simply hallucinating more pleasant imagery while viewing disturbing content?" he offered, watching workers process their 400th violation report that hour. "It's a mindfulness technique I learned at Burning Man."
Facility supervisor James Kimani reported growing concern as Altman pitched increasingly frantic workplace improvements. "He kept insisting we add achievement badges for most traumatic content processed. 'Legendary Violation Spotter' was one of his suggestions."
When workers expressed concerns about their $2 hourly wage, Altman brightened. "Think of it as seed funding for your personal growth journey," he explained. "Plus, this accelerated emotional intelligence training would cost thousands at Stanford Business School."
The visit reached its breaking point at minute 45 when Altman was asked to moderate a sequence of explicit content violations. Witnesses say he muttered "This isn't aligned with my personal optimization framework!" before speed-walking to his waiting convoy.
OpenAI's PR team later released a statement calling the visit "transformatively insightful." They announced a bold new initiative to provide content moderators with AI-generated motivational quotes about digital resilience.
The company's other executives have since canceled their scheduled visits, citing conflicts with their longevity optimization workshops.
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